Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Views of propriety of relationships I may have

The research into sexual assault and rape cases has made me change my mind about the appropriateness of having women between legal age and 40 as appropriate sexual/romantic partners for myself. I don't see women in that age range as appropriate partners for myself any more, but only women over 40. I say this because too many men legal age to 40 hurt women, either deliberately, because of immaturity, or because the culture teaches folks our age to see each other as sexual partners only, instead of romantic partners, friends, and intellectual equals.

On a personal note, I believe that if I were to deal with women under 40 as potential sexual partners instead of allies and friends, I would be imposing myself on a woman's environment instead of befriending her. I would be pushing myself into her space, instead of waiting for her invitation, and I would be taking advantage of the lack of experience she has compared to older women, in much the same way as a molester takes advantage of a minor's lack of maturity.

For myself, I believe that the best way for my to deal with women legal age to 40 is to be friends with them and NOT romantic or sexual partners. There are too many things that have to occur in order for me to have a healthy relationship - maturity on both sides, the assurance that there are legitimate reasons for my interest from her point of view, and the feeling that I'm taking advantage of her lack of experience on my end.

(More to come later)

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